bro's before hoes? hmm

been perving on peoples blogs.
and this topic has came up twice :)


tbh, even though im a girl...
i understand this.
guys shouldnt be spending every waking moment
with there girlfriend
statistically on 5% of high school relationships last
THATS NOT ALOT.
both guys and girls need to realise that friends are important.
im lucky enough that i have pretty amazing friends
and my boyfriend is just great.
but i couldnt spend every minute with either of them
i just would ruin both relationships.


back to the point....
i dont see why 15 -16 year olds expect so much from relationships.
now that brings me on to another subject.
MAN-SLAGS !
HOLY SHIT. what the fuck is up with people these
days thinking a relationship is based solely on sex.
a relationship is when you can have a good time with someone
without losing yer clothes. a relationship is when yee share interests
with someone. NOT JUST SEX!
i know people who have been going out for 2 years and they havent
had sex ! and theyre the happiest couple i know !


im not saying m relationship is perfect.
all i know is me and ryan have established boundries
with spending time together and i actually dont mind him
being with his mates when im there.
i make myself useful and thats how ive managed to get them to
tolerate me :) the fact i can take an insult or two gets me through.


SERIOUSLY! get a grip , stop having sex so much , get some mates
&&& TALK WITH EACH OTHER [not sexual!!!]
it really does help trust :)


bros before hoes mate ;)


xox

june :)

first post in ages :)
and i need to rant.


right, i know these two people
who piss most people off.
especially me :)
one of them is just a selfish arsehole
and the other is just a fooking psyco


they fuck each other about suhin afwi
and moan about it to my boyfriend and i.
its so fucking annoying !!
me and ryan are HAPPY
we dont need you's fucking moaning to us
about your shitty little games.
either start a relationship and quit using
sex as your only link to each other
or leave each other the fuck alone.
it sick and wrong what going on.


godsaaake
get a grip :)
xxx

quickie ...again

random update.
i pure love my life atm.


exams ; 5 down 2 to go :D


and i honestly think....
im in love....
im not allowed to be.
even if he doesnt...
i know he loves me ....even if hes not IN love.


anyways thats confusing paha


1. lifes great
2. im still on study leave
3. lifes more than great


and yes ...im truely not being sarcastic :D
xox

long time (:

not posted in ages.
been studying alot .
exams next week :


ah well...
lifes great.
things are stilll running smoothly
with ryan ,
with school,
with the parents.


apart from the whole mum
finding out about sex/pill
this weeks been awesome.
me & ryan could total live together
the house was spotless (:


much love
xx

HAPPY BIRTHDAYY TOO DEEAAAN (L)

hm..having a nice day in myself :)
guitar hero world tour ? i think so sheeen ;)


cant wait till tomorrow :)
glasgow shopping with my mum :)
got like £300 to spend on clothes :D
YASS !
then deans 16th :)
wooo :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY BAAABE XD


xox

quickie :)

im total gutting my room.
anyone who been in my room..will tell you...
its ALWAYS a total mess.
but since exams are coming up....
i cant study in a messy area
so i need it to be spotless :)
aye im a freak. but kehn it works :)
been actually tidying for 2 hours ...
and i not even half done lols


but yeh yesterday was nice :)
more xbox with ryan :)
lifes pretty sweeet atm :)
we seem to be getting on alot better
and can seem to find more things to do
and talk about :) its awesome :)


just dini want anything to fuck it up .

legendary cat ;)

awww not blogged in a while...
basically matts 18th - giid
yashin - AMAZING !!


now for today antics :)
ryan stayed last night ...
my mum and dad *as per usual*
came in drunk...so this morning ,
with a massive hangover,
they took us to ASDA ,
for a full scottish breakfast. YUM!


went to ryan's.
play resident evil 5 .
"thats fucking teaam work !"
and left for dead (L)
then we went a walk in the quarry.
ryan showed me all the places he used
to hang out when he was wee.
we sat down at this wee river ,
rather nice tbh :)


went back home to his, had dinner.
then played some more xboax * love that thing btw*
then we took ryan dog tasha out
another walk in the quarry.
we had some nice little conversations :)
went back to his.
played more left for dead.


then we went another nice little walk.
where i pointed out the "legendary"
cat...which i meant the symbolic cat...
coz its where we first pulled :)
then we talked about the wee chinese cat with the wavy arm...
i said it looked like it was jacking someone off.
like sideways ....
LOL!


god today was nice :)
8 months this weekend :D



xox

:)

And I know that it's so cliche to tell you that everyday

I spend with you is the new best day of my life

Everyone watching us just turns away with disgust

It's Jealously, they can see that we've got it going on

And I'm racking my brain for a new improved way

To let you know your more to me than what I know how to say

You're OK with the way this is going to be

This is going to be the best thing we've ever seen

If anyone can make me a better person you could

All I gotta say is I must've done something good

I came along one day and you rearranged my life

All I gotta say is I must've done something right

I must've done something right

-relient k must have done something right

today was okay.

i pulled a muscle so my leg hurts ...

but awkh well

cant wait till next weekend

friday - ?

saturday - matthews 18th

sunday - dance show rehearsal

yashin !

im gonna be so dead on monday tho :/

xox

depressed :(

Well you are the one, the one that lies close to me.

Whispers "Hello, I've missed you quite terribly."

I fell in love, in love with you suddenly.

Now there's no place else I could be but here in your arms.

hellogoodbye - here in your arms

there is so much i can say but words get in the way

when i wanna find you i just close my eyes

you'll never be that far away from me

so don't say goodbye

ryan carbrera - i will remember you

two song that describe my mood.

.

there something in the back of my mind thats making me upset.

i havent figured out what, but its starting to keep me awake at night

i dont like it . i hate not having control over myself.

im an emotional wreck i cry at natasha bedingfield ? wtf...

i miss the old times.

i was looking through really old bebo comments.

found the first comment ryan ever left me..

he called me a fanny lols.

but he was saying he missed me and that ...

it was so cute.....

what happened ae ?

now we just argue and fight about whos in a mood at someone

help ? please.....

:'(

rant no.2

im a bit calmer.
but...
i think people forget...
RYAN IS MY!!! BOYFRIEND
not theirs.


so bloody remember that bitches.
8-)
xox

rant mate.

oh this leads on, im sick of not being trusted
by my parents, by my friends.
seriously?!
i wouldnt cheat again.
and im not gonna do anything !
fs. get a grip ! its nothing to do with you's.


thirdly, i hate how people assume im nice.
i have to act like little miss fucking sunshine all the time.
but sometimes i just wanna kill someone.
im so fucked up , you just wouldnt believe it.


i HATE! how people treat me like a total slag.
i cant even hug a guy. without some wee stupid lassie
coming up to me asking if that was my boyfriend?
and yes it was, but its none of their buisness.


i hate how i got a fucking C in english ?!?!
me a c?!?! WHAT THE HELL !?!
then this morning. my parents started shouting at me for it ?!
so fucking what !?
.
argh :/

nothing changed like

Maybe I was stupid

For telling you goodbye

Maybe I was wrong

For tryin' to pick a fight

I know that I've got issues

But you're pretty messed up too

Either way I found out

I'm nothing without you

Being with you is so dysfunctional

I really shouldn't miss you,

But I can't let you go,

Cuz we belong together now, yea yea

Forever united here somehow, yea

You got a piece of me

And honestly

My life would suck without you

.

kelly clarkson - My life would suck without you

i have pms.

its shite lol.

bring on summer.

fuck everything.

ryan. i love you .

simple as.

deal with it :)

x

update :)

everythings great


boyfriends still aaamazing
got my best friends back
made up with someone i didnt think i could


yepp
lifes fabby atm
xox

update (y)

i got my friends back.
natalie
lisa
hazel
jemma
and liam
you's guys are the best (y)


new schools ok.
i keep getting lost 8-)
lol


xox

underclass hero (8)

i feell all bleurghh again.
i want to cuddle up in bed with ryan :(
like last night :/


yesterday was ok.
yes, just okay for me


smoked till my lungs hurt
and sat it the rain + wind
fun !


but ayee.
people who know me well.
should know...i hate failure
if i cant do something.
i have a complete breakdown
*for example* history exam - hitting head off table


i just get really frustrated with myself.
AND! end up crying.. as per usual.

fun times 8-) :(


i wish it was summer :(
xox

eventfull dayy :)

new school ?
doesnt seem real atm


scary car journeys ?
almost cried


becks beer ?
is waaay to fizzy


the police?
seem to follow wilson


ayee so went to wilsons last nitee
and drank some....
then went out.


wilson + ryan got caught 8-)
by the police ..
blah blah blah.


i had the bloody drink paha
i couldnt move coz the bottles clinked
it was scary


went back to wilsons ate pizza.
then i had to go home D:
wilsons mum gave me a life
wilson came with mee :)


the same police people who caught them drinking
pulled wilsons mum over for something.
me + wilson hid paha


i went to bed


AND GUESS WHIT!!
SHE FORGOT HER CLOTHES ! PAHAHAH


xox

fuck saaake

i actually wish we were back at school 8-)
im so fucking bored.


2 days in a row.
in the house myself ...


whits the point like 8-)

memories :)

aww i love it when you remember wee silly things.


number one


the first day i hung about with dionne.
we bought helium balloons ..barney and tweety pie.
tweety pie was mines. and dionne put lickety lips on barney !
so he was pubescent lmao.
then we met meesh claire and mark. and walked up cally p.
mark pulled his trousers and boxers down....
and put his scarf round his waist....
and walked about like that.
then we got to the benches....
and there was like....ryan wee chris ghamm and cheesy + tht.
wee chris was rather pished so he stole me and dionnes
balloon weights and melted them together to form
what he called " a brabbit " ( bear and a rabbit (i)
then ...*this was before i met ryan* he stole my balloon
which was tied to my trousers...and popped
a hole in it with a fag so he could inhale the helium 8-)
BABE YOU OWE ME A BALLOON !!!


that was around 8 months ago : sooo....june / july ?
now : im going out with ryan.
and chris still rips the shit outtta me LMFAO!


number two


that day with the lucomaw and buckfart !
ayee the day i hit my head off the bus roof!!
aww so it started offff ...
me dean amy meep shelly meesh and kay ..i think
we got drink ....i let everyone try orange lucozade mixed with vodka
they liked it and said i was clearly cool :L!!
then dean found a marker pen in his bag so wrote lucomaww on my bottle.
then we went down the skatepark
(aye these were the days we used to drink doon the back :L)
i bought ice lollies ...WHICH GOT STOLEN BY EVERYONE!
coz it was really sunny
we met jamie and ryan and aww that.
took some pictures....
lol
then we went up the spot....
drank more and took more pictures.....


number three


that party at mines....
nuffsaid.
meep cage dancing in my shower.
simon eating all the sweets and hiding the wrapers in my mums shoes
dean getting naked in my bathroom.
meesh and leahanne eating uncooked pizza
them hiding plastic balls everywhere !!
and me and ryan ....dissapearing for an hour...
goooood times..


cant wait till this summer
xox

Every now and again I pretend i'm okay but that's not what gets me

so ayee.
had a massive argument with my mum.
coz my rooom was a mess.


i packed my bags and moved to my grans.
within an hour my mum was at the door .
PAHA! win


so aye doctors this morning.
nothing wrong with me :S
then why cant i sleep ?


i had the worst dream ever last night
everyone who i know kept dying.
it reminded me of final destination.
stay away from city simon !!!
LMAO!


but aye. still of school.
back half day on friday :)
non-uniform and shizzz
scooore.


xox

So come and take me away, from this monster that you've made of me. (8)

i quite fancy brokencyde likee :)


so yeh.
still off school :)
did all my work aswell :)
chuffed much ? XD


i still cant sleep.
got the doctors tomorrow.
fun :/




so yeees,
today went to ryans.
usual (6) paha.
was giid.
im apparently a good wee housewife.
lmfao. i made pasta :)


he made me cry !
i have an irrational fear of knives
and he total chased me in the bathroom.
i cried ....coz he scared me :(


awwkhhh
lifes amazing.
my boyfriends perfect.
my friends are awesome.
and schools going great


happiest ive been in a long while
xox

boredd sheeen ;)

im bored.
i dont like sundays.


yesterday was lovely.
sat in with ryan all daaay (L)
i pure love the boy aha .


he was hungover.
so i went to the shop
and bought irn-bru and oreos.
and i makde myself feel sick.
ate too many oreos !!


so ayee. later on.
we got pizza.
and it was yummmmmy :)


but now....im bored.
im watching dirty dancing.
and eating a pot nooodle.
im still in bed .
heehee


byee !
xox

geeesooo :O

ive just relised how much work i have


english - critical essay , discursive essay + close reading
chemistry - past paper
biology - 5 homework booklets
maths- homework sheet
history - essay and question about the jews ?
french - whole module of reading + writings.
moddies - learn course notes
art - expressive essay


FUR FUCK SAKE ! thats alot.
seriously. im gonna sit in all today doing most, if not all ,of it.


FUN FUN FUNN!


xox

(n)

You fight about money, bout me and my brother
And this I come home to, this is my shelter
It ain't easy growin up in World War III
Never knowin what love could be,
you'll see I don't want love to destroy me
like it has done my family


this is shite.
my parents are fighting.
like majorly.
my dad's been kicked out.


how many times has this happened lately?
alot.
but this time.....
its wayy more than its ever been.


im sick of it.
i know how much them fighting fucked me up
when i was younger.
now its happening to my brother.
and it makes me feel sick.
to know hes gonna be like me .


i blame most of my anger
and commitment issues on my parents.
i grew up witht hem throwing shit at each other.
my dad moving out every other week.
and me and my mum staying with my gran.


no way am i ever gonna be like that !


xox

happy birthday kelly :)

its my big sisters b-daaay :)
we got her a holiday to tenerife so shes away :)
22 todaaay :) x


meh...
so another weekend in.
im getting used to it now.
im in a good mood.
my rooms tidy.
my hairs behaving :)
so everythings ghiiiiid :D


me and ryan ? - 6 months yesterday.
quite an achievement for me.
he spent it in the pub :/
which annoyed me a wee bit.
but kehn ...im over it .
theres more to life than being unhappy.


i have a lot of ambition now :)
its quite giid :)
need B's in...
higher english
maths
chemistry
and physics
might take biology ..
but five highers is alot.


meh...
xox

:(

another friday night alone.
fun times :(
pfft..


its nice to know i can rely on yeez ^o)
seriously.....you's all care about
drink more than me...thanks ae.


im getting quite sick of everything


im sick of always being unhappy because
i cant do anything right for anyone..


im sick of not being able to sleep
because im worrying about stuff


im sick of losing the only person who was
gonna make my life alot better
r.i.p amy-louise :( (my future goddaughter)


im sick of people using me to get
whatever they want.


im sick of having people tell me im manipulative
toward males. which may be true.


nd tbh...lifes crap atm.
im depressed to fuck.
and i just cant believe everything that happened
to me this week....
what have i done to deserve it all?


ive did fuck all....thats what.


:( x

So I let down my guard drop my defences down by my clothes

i think im gonna die like.
it was -6 when i went out this morning.
not nice.


icy and cold ?
ayet.
oh btw. see if you even think of making
a wee smart comment like that
again when ryans not there.
ill fucking smack you. seriously.(:


life quite ok.
id like to keep it that way


xox

shite!

im bored
my skins a mess
and my face hurts
great ?
NAW
xox

(U):'(

Rain outside my window pouring down

What now, your gone, my fault, I'm sorry

Feeling like a fool cause I let you down

Now it's, too late, to turn it around

I'm sorry for the tears I made you cry

I guess this time it really is goodbye

You made it clear when you said

I just don't love you no more

omg :'(

ive ruined everything again.

this time...i dont even know what ive done.

i didnt put enough effort into winning him back.

im a fucking stupid BITCH! for losing him in the first place.

its my own stupid fucking fault :'(

i literally hate and despise myself

seriously why do i ruin my own life

and other people's who i really care about.

i need to let him decide whether he wants to let go.

i cant stand seeing him upset :'(

it will kill me inside if i have to say end this to him.

but i have to do whats best for him just now.

its not all about me.

...

xox

february already :)

well...
one month over of 2009:)
only 9 months till im legal ;)


tbh. this months has been good :)
still with ryan.
got all credit grades in my prelims.
not made any big mistakes.


so ayee yesterday wasnt good.
i cried alot.
OH MYY GOSH!!!
matthew got kicked in .
he hit ryan >.>
im gonna kill him on monday (:


im so agressive aha.
people find it funny :)
coz i shout alot.


today should be better :)


xox

aye im grounded got nothing better to do.

so ayee.
this is the way i let emotion out.
on a fucking stupid internet blog.
pfft, what a joke?


i feel physically sick with boredom.
im upset and feel awfi bad.


whilst my boyfriend and his "mates"
are out drinking ...and my friends too.
im stuck in the house bored to tears :(
does anyone care? nuut.


all i got was , " its yer own fault"
and tbh it is.
but i feel like SHITE!
my parents refuse to speak to me
and i have NOBODY to keep me company.


trying to get *someone* to come over.
but personally, im not getting my hopes up.
afterall, drinks above me in priorities :(
and tbh...id rather be drinking than with me .


but kehn it would be nice to be thought of.
im sitting here pure crying my eyes out.
and who actually cares?
ill tell yee.....NOONE!
its always my fault.
and usually....it is.
but it wid be nice to have some emotional support.


yeez always say yer there for me..
ayee when it stupid little things.
but when its a big thing like this....
i cant really count on anyone to be there for me.
i phone people. there phones are off.
or they say they'll call me back and dont.


its fucking great.
kehn whit fuck this.
im an inconvinence to everyone.
including my parents and friends.
just....whats the point :(


...

prelim results :)

i dont think i posted this.
all my studying paid off


biology KU-1 PS-1
chemistry KU-2 PS-2
history KU-1 ES-1
moddies KU-1 ES-1
french R-2 L-1 W-2 S-1 Overall = 1
art prelim-1 essay-1


why does everyone think im stupid ?!?!
LOOK!!! ^^
im like ...smart !!
:D


xox

fuck this shit !!! ARGH!

im grounded for a month
no phone either.
god damn £110.00 phone bill !


seriously you'd think i'd killed someone
there being total DICKS to me now.
they basically refuse to talk to me :(


ryan ? go hurry up and come on msn ?
i need you to come over.
since im not allowed out :(
i need someone to keep me sane.


xox

fuck yees all btw :)

rght lets get suhin straight here.
my relationship might not be aw


"i love you and want to be with you forever"


but its amazing. ok?
im sick of people making stupid
wee comments about how we always argue.
THATS JUST US !!!


if you know us ATAAL!!!
youd know we get on great.
ayee we might not be yer average couple


but weev lasted 6 month !
so it must be working >.>!0!!


SO MEEEH


xox

k!

relentless tour !?!- amaze!
except the guys not getting in :(
i cried.
msi were amazing.
dir en grey were hotties
and my foots all bruised
gid night ? AYEEE!
xox

bomb thiiisss traaaack !

gosh im sooo excited!
RELENTLESS TOMORROW!


taking the day off school.
ryan coming over ?
train in with the crew (h)
glasgooow!
banter


update tomorrow :)
xox

i love you and that's all I really know (8)

i got my relentless outfit :)
its rather sweeeeet .
i actually cant wait.


if i can get within
10 metres of oli sykes
my life will be complete :$:D
hes total OAFT!


got new school clothes
and a bag :)


im in a total good mood tnite
for a change ae ?
im sitting watching mean girls :)
coz im coool :)


im gonna go to bed i think :)(i)
xox

:)

well friday night was beastin !
apart from me and hannah
not getting invited!
but we made our own fun
chat logs seem so funny
when youre not crying.


yesterday? AMAZE!
went up toon with dean
"MRS SHORT GIT YER RAT OOT"
aww heehee
"we'll make them fight!"
got drink got pished got glowsticks


met lets see if i can remember :)
dionne jamie haddy ross alex matt
kevin ..err cant remember anyone else


fuds set a bench on fire
police chased them .
i laughed.
sobered up.


went to the bus stop
wilson ryan and simon
came back to mines :)
we watched scarymovie
i made pizza.
we laughed.
simon covered me in nutella !
and whipped me with a dishtowel >.>


drink + amaze people = ledge night XD!


xox

im a huffy shit.

im a moody bitch.
i annoy everyone.
upset people.
AND! myself.


i shouldnt be allowed friends
i just make them unhappy
with my moods.
fun times ae?


BIT! hannahs coming over
eeee !
since our burds are away 8-)
ah well ae...who needs them to have fun!


xox

ambitions?

• get straight credit grades in my standard grades
• pick 4 highers ( english math biology chemistry )
• somehow get through fifth year
• january 2010- apply for ineos apprenticeship
• if i dont get it - do sixth year ( advanced higher maths + chemistry)
• if i do - go to college - get HNC in process chemical engineering
• after the course - technician position at ineos grangemouth
• LEARN TO DRIVE !!
• get my own flat. move out

all by the time im say.....21 ?

sounds reasonable

after that ? kids ?

who knows maybe one. if im not crazy

(y)

argh..
im moody as fuck.
and keep randomly crying.
what the foook ae ha.


tday was gid.
had my last prelim.
went to ryan instead
of english and maths


went home.
felt reallly ill.
so i slept .
and now im trying to sleep again.


xox

down it goes :(

seriously who cares?
im upset.
who do i talk to?
you tell me to talk to you.
and i do try
i rely on you so much.
you've been with me through alot.
and i trust you with anything.
you are the one person
i can always count on.
our relationship might not
be "normal" or perfect.
but i love you. just the way you are.


i love how we fight like crazy.


i love how you let me win sometimes


i love how one moment im on the ground.
and the next yer kissing me.


i love how i can be myself round you


i love how im completly bitchwhipped
and do everything you ask


i love when yee stay over and i wake up forgetting your here
and the smile on my face when i do


i love how you always know when somethings wrong


i love the story of how we met.


i love the fact you took me back .


yeh.. i love you


xox

more good news :D

passed my personal study.

yey !

i like passing things (:

makes me feel smart

butt yeees ...

today i was moody

i made people laugh.

i did my art prelim :)

wanna see it !!

but im moody and annoying (:

but apparently !!

im a laugh

so allls goood

xox

anyone wanna hear a story (:

right ...this is true
but alot of yous dont know it..
it may answer a question
i got asked today


before this *girl* is on bus
a *boy* from her school is on.
*girl* recognises *boy*
before her stop *girl*
hits her head off bus roof
later that day ...she meets *boy* again
when hes with his friends.


*girl* has a fling with one of the *boy* friends
until he goes on holiday
and then......


right so one day ..lets say *girl*
goes out with her friend.
they go uptown and decide to drink.
tut tut ae?
they get the older *boy* to get it.
then as they waited ..
undercover cops asked them about it.
so *girl* gets *boy*s number
off her friend to warn him.


*girl* phones *boy* agrees to meet
with friends up the spot.
*girl* has 70cl bottle of vodka
and gets rather drunk.
*girl* friend also gets very
drunk and passes out on the ground.


*boy* although he has never met *girl*
before ..looks after her.
take her to pee. buys her water.
holds her hair back whilst shes being sick.
and just generally helps.


*girl* had to go home to her
mums wedding rehersal.
on the way home *girl* had sobered
up and then she text *boy*
to say thanks.
*girl* and *boy* got talking by text.


the next day *boy* friend was home and
*girl* and him had an argument
*girl* went to *boy* for help
and *girl and boy* tried to make him jealous


later that week *girl* and *boy* met up :)
had some fun .
then it was *girl* mums wedding.
*girl* and her friends phone *boy*
and annoy him to ask *girl* out
but *boy* said no coz he was going on holiday.


whilst *girl* parents were on holiday
she had a party and *boy* came.
they had even more fun and total hit it off.
then when *boy* went on holiday for 3 weeks :(
and *girl* made a silly mistake ( one of many )


*girl* told *boy* and they fell out.
the next day after thinking it was over
*boy* text *girl* saying sorry :)
and all was fine again XD


then ...it was a week before *boy* came home
*girl* got grounded for smoking.
*boy* found out and text her asking
if *girl* would go out with him,
and that he was gonna ask her that saturday
but she was grounded.
*girl* didnt have any texts left so she had to phone
her friend to get her to text *boy* back saying YES!


that saturday*girl * got ungrounded early
went uptown again
and met *boy* :D


22/08/08 <3

yey !

got some of my prelim results back (:


biology - KU - 1 PS- 1
history- KU- 1 ES - 1


yey for my smartness :)
straight ones sheeeeen
still to get my moddies
and chemistry...
chemistry was kinda hard likes
think i might have got a 3 :/


art prelim tomorrow
french on friday (:
two easy ones likee (:


so ayee today ...
matthew was being a dick
ryan set him straight :)
yey !
xox

super weekend :)

basically...
ryan stayed
friday + saturday
went uptooon
we had to babysit sat.night
matthew went to bed
watched scary movie + 1408
and beverly hill cop :)

was well giid
i pure love the boy
even if he does want to keep
me locked in a cupboard +
throw oranges at me through a hole

xox

update.

im stressed.
im scared.
im ill.
im kinda upset.
and most of all
im confused to fuck !

bleurghhh :(

aha i loooove cruel intentions !

Get your ass on the bed and prepare for the fuck of your life.

After what you put me through I deserve it.

.

but yesss....im ill :)

i threw up alot.

it was icky :(

.

ive had a hard week.

too many exams

chemistry tomorrow :(

im scared!

.

ryans staying tomorrow :)

should be good :)

.

im away to throw up sum more :)

byee :)

xox

RANT !!

okay ...people worry me these days.
oh and yes ...ryan i finally!!
understand what you meant the other night !!
.
ok fairdooos !!??!! you can love a person
right fair enuff !
but i think people have to remember we are only like
15 / 16 ?
.
i know its pure nice to think that you could
spend the rest of yer life with the person yer with now..
and it has happened obviously...
but i think these days people are being really unrealistic,
if it does happen HOORAAH!!!
if it doesnt ? which is very likely ...
move on ae? weer still young
.
its just not right to be total spending every
waking moment of yer life with or wanting to be with
one person.....thats how yee end up losing them !!
they neeed spaaaace :)
xox
RANT OVER!

It's times like these you learn to live again (8)

im stressed , exausted and slightly depressed tbh

bleurghhh...

exams are total making me feel like shite tbh !

.

had biology today...never studied.

found it easy lol.

history tomorrow...i really need to study .

but i just dont have the energy.

i havent slept properly in days :(

.

after our "minor" fallout..

me and ryan seem to be getting on alot better

the understanding seems to be there now.

if only i could stop being a moody bitch ae :^)

.

bleurghh...i seriously feel like shite.

its like...appallingly bad !!

im listning to ...

fuck noes but its cheery :)

.

school seems to be dragging me down lately

i need a good night in/out with someone.

in : watch way too many movies eat way too muc

out: get crunk baaabe !

.

but ayee...i seem to be total down in the duuumps

especially this week and it only TUESDAY !!!

only...*counts* 3 more days ....
and ....2 more exams ....this week anyways :(

.

post title ? ironic i know :)

ah well gonna go study hitler ae 8-)

catchhhh homeslice !

xox

It's overrated, just get another drink and watch me come undone(8)

got nothing to sayy tbh
schoools stressful ...sick of exams tbh

lifes average...nothing changed really

.

so ayee ...

this was very pointless....i suhin happens ill post

but i doubt it tbh

xox

we can live like jack and sally if we want (8)

aha i love blink 182 <3
been a total ghiiid weekend tbh

.

statements

.

babee i pure love you ok ?

never leave me ? or ill cry

im total glad weev sorted stuff out

tbh things are much better already (: <3

.

aww yer lovelee (:

not know you that long but had so much banter

i think its great our burds are like paals

gives us more banter ae (:

lu my material girl lol (:

.

but ayeee biology chemistry and history exams this week

godsaaakes ae lol

xox

aha score (: ive figured it out

oh my goshh

todays was ok.

with the exception of my parents

imminent divorce.

had my moddies exam

was quite easy.

went "home" at lunch

coz i was feeling "sick"

not coz i was stressed ae lol

.

i really went to ryans

had some fun

then went home

and what a coincidence !

i was sick.

.

but ayee i finally have

some solid carreer aspects

.

im taking

higher chemistry

higher biology

higher english

higher maths

and maybe higher human biology

in fifth year

.

then ..i duno if ill do sixth

but if i do

advanced higher maths

+

advanced higher chemistry

+

advanced higher biology

.

then im apply for a modern

apprenticeship with Ineos grangemouth

to become a process chemical engineer

aha ayyeee ...

its that easy :)

xox

reply x

logical reason "/well ...here it goes my reasoning was it was either that or hurt you more....i just knew i wasnt just gonna get away from him easily...ill be honest ..i didnt expect it to go that far...and i soooo wish it hadnt.but the logical reason that sticks in my head was i had to prove how much of a dick he was or i was never gonna convince myself...and then i would end up thinking he was a decent guy ( which he isnt ) it honestly wasnt anything to do with you ..i loved you to bits .. and i still do ...if not even more now...it made me realise that he was a dick and that he wasnt worth any of the bother he had caused before.it also made me realise that i truely love you and wouldnt ever do that to anyone again.you're the only one who can make me smile the way i do when im with you. you make even the shittest day seem like nothings ever wrong.you are the one i truely love.and im so sorry

.ilu xox ):

thats the problem...

sorry about that one
im stressed
got prelims...
having some problems etc..
ive got like hardly anyone to talk to
it like no-one cares ..
probably right ae ):
im going insane
x

uber bad mood

since im in a bad moood

lets see what i hate/dislike

.

• the person who blackmailed me then told anyways
• the person who caused all this bother and lied about it
• stupid wee girls who think their fucking gorgeous!
• ever more stupid fat ned girls who talk about their 19 year old boyfriends who live in another part of the country...have they even seen you?
• mornings unless ive had at least 3 cups of black coffee
• sugar puffs , frosties , cheerios and other sugary cereals !!
• seafood - its an allergy not a dislike!!
• the rain that blows in the wind and total soaks you
• waiting on my schoool bus with annoying people
• having a lighter and no fags
• having fags and no lighter !
• any form of tonic wine : including buckfast eww
• vodka and irn-bru
• normal irnbru and cola
• the fact i say yogert instead of yogurt
• people who say their fat and are skinnier than me !! it like am i obese!?!
• minimosh....nuff said...
• the staff in fooot locker in Glasgow who go on cake breaks
• getting lost
• the fact i cheated on the only person ive loved ...
• the fact i hate myself and am not gonna forgive myself.....ever...

xox

oh deaaar

first day back at school?

shite ae...

.

but ayeee statement time :)

1. i got you back..we were really close for a while

now it back to the way it used to be...

we never talk...and i feel as if we are drifting apart

i want this to work so badly ):

2. thanks for everything..you got me through the breakup

and the make up...you give awesome advice

and i hope things work out...you deserve it :)

as you said one of the lads ;)

3. your still the closest i have to a best friend

he complains at me that im friends with you

but kehn...he cant really tell me who to be friends with

i wouldnt be here if it wasnt for you :) x

im officially on a diet.

well a fake diet.

my parents called me fat

and said i had a fat ass:(

so im gonna scare them by not eating lol

but im gonna eat at school obv !

xox

remember me tonight when you're asleep :)<3

The best thing about tonight's that we're not fighting

It could it be that we have been this way before?

I know you don't think that I am trying

I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath

Because tonight will be the night

That I will fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day

I swear it's true

Because a girl like you is impossible to find

You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended

I always swore to you I'd never fall apart

You always thought that I was stronger

I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start

Ohh, but hold your breath

Because tonight will be the night

That I will fall for you over again

Don't make me change my mind

.

.

its 2009 and im ready to make it the best year yet.

for the first time ever ive started the year with a boyfriend.

and tbh i have no intent on losing him now lol

i had to work hard for him and no blooody way im losing him !

.

.

im gonnna make a wee bit of a change i think.

not anything too drastic likes.

just gonna cut down a wee bit on the fags and drink.

try and get some PROPER friends like BEST friends

and get closer to the ones ive got kehhhhn :)

.

.

im actually total looking forward to this year.

im determined to make it better the 2008

and no more mistakes ....

xox

2009 ? nothings changed 8-)

And if I open my heart to you,

I'm hoping you'll show me what to do,

And if you help me to start again,

You know that I'll be there for you in the end

music +lyrics awesome movie

.

but ayee...

2009 ?- ok so far..

studied for my prelims yesterday

.

toon today ?

half bottle+lucozade= braaaw

didnt get drunk...

had an amazing fire..

total cosy as anything..

all we needed was marshmallows

.

but ayee...

i got told tonight that me + the burd

are perfect for each other?

i thought about it a wee bit and maybe we are.

afterall how have we went from 22/8/08

till now ...only having about 2 weeks apart

that must meean suhin ae?

.

see tbh words cant express how much i love him

he makes my day everytime im with him.

fairdoos...i mucked him about BIGTIME!

but he forgave me and took me back

so now fucking way am i losing him again

i wouldnt be myself without him

lu!

xox

lets make 2009 count aee :)?

so its finally new year.

i want to make this year decent.

.

hopefully see another new year with the burd

total love the boy.

stayed with him last night was ghiiid (:

except i apparantly sleep sitting up lol.

.

so ayee new years resolutions? a few tbh..:)

.

1. quit smoking

2. keep ryan

3.pass my exams

.

so ayee :)

happy new year

xox